The Jebber Family Blog

Hmmm...Do you have a secret? I do! And I'm not telling!!!
But, I will tell you that I have a love for my 12 year old self. Well...12-17. I had so much fun when I was 12 and I enjoy reliving those days, Especially with friends that didn't share those moments with me way back when. We're able to share these moments together and it really has been a BLAST! (some of these are fuzzy...Cuz I was jumping...Hey don't judge me!)

Posted by Cassie at 9:22 PM | Permalink | Comments

On Saturday, I got together with some of my friends from High School. As always, we had a great time. It never fails, I always learn something new about myself from my high school days as people begin to reminisce. Sometimes I feel like the character in the show "Samantha Who". I truly must have blocked most of my Stow High days out. Regardless, I had a blast.

Posted by Cassie at 8:03 AM | Permalink | Comments

As a Daughter: My Father, is my best friend. He has been since I was a kid. He takes my "crap" and gives it right back. He is my hero. I know I have said that before, but it is the truth. Many of you may not know this, but my Dad adopted me, and raised me as his own. I am forever grateful to him for the life I have.
I am emotionally spent at the moment.
I am incapable of being sappy.
I am delightfully lucky to have been able to spend this Father's Day with my Dad. Just a month ago we weren't sure how long we'd have him here with us. Today, he is here and I enjoy each and every second!
As a Wife: My husband is my strength. He is the greatest father to our children. I thank God every day that we are blessed with his love, his patience, his compassion and his humor.
Today was a wonderful day. We woke up and went to church, where we heard a sensational sermon. We had breakfast with my Dad and my brother. We came home and let the kids play in the sprinkler. Patrick and the kids napped while I made dinner for our dad's. We got to spend our Father's day with our Dad's and it was wonderful.
PS: I think Connor has found his calling...Today was his first day playing baseball and he was SUPER!

Posted by Cassie at 8:31 PM | Permalink | Comments

Connor: Oh Mom, come here quick. Look at this
Me: (looking, horrified at a frog in 3 parts. Guts and all on our back patio) Oh, honey. Daddy is on his way home from work, and he will take care of it...Mommy gets queasy...Let's play somewhere else.
Connor: Mom, what do you think happened to the "turtle"? (in a stutter) Do..Do..Do, um. Do you think a Bear got him?
Me: I think that is highly unlikely
Connor: (looking in the direction of the gore) But, Mom look at him!
Me: Connor honey, just stay away from it. He's not there anymore anyway...He's in heaven now.
Connor: No he's not! (Pointing at the pieces and parts of the dead frog) He's RIGHT THERE! Daddy will fix him when he gets home.

Posted by Cassie at 12:54 PM | Permalink | Comments

It's Monday! Really?...How is it only Monday? Ok, totally besides the point.

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Posted by Cassie at 2:17 PM | Permalink | Comments

I haven't been blogging much lately. My mind is spinning with things to say, but my fingers can't type the words. So I was thinking of trying to fill with some strange "random facts" or "Quotes". I was thinking Monday's would become my random fact day about myself or maybe my family.
Maybe something you already know about me, maybe something you wish you didn't know! If I find that I am having a boring day (I find myself EXTREMELY boring more often than not), then I will try to find a quote that has recently inspired me. Today I feel a bore! Here is my QUOTE!

Posted by Cassie at 12:11 PM | Permalink | Comments

Melissa is an inspiration to me. She helps me hold on to my faith. I really don't know how she does it, but she is just amazing! Here is an update she sent on her first day without funeral "stuff" to deal with.


Today was a good day. I guess everyone is waiting for me to fall apart or crack it feels like but I am OK. See the one thing about Amber and me is that we truly have been through everything together. We were so in sync with each other. We shared everything, talked about everything and were everything to each other. This past year especially it came to a point that I could feel her pain literally not in the severe sense that she was but I knew when she did that something was hurting her. She knew me that I didn't have to tell her something was up she could read my mind. We had this unspoken language that no one else could understand. I wonder at times why this isn't as hard as everyone tells me it is supposed to be. I have realized that the reason it is not is because she is still here with me. I still feel her here. The best way I can describe it is think of when you are driving with the kids in the car. Mine always fell asleep as soon as we started on the road. They were in the back seat sleeping so you weren't talking to them but they were still there. That is how I feel. She is still here. Jim and I had many good talks today and it seems like we were both thinking the same things recently but haven't had the time to express them to each other. Amber gave us so much. So many gifts she left us not even knowing it... or maybe she did know it. A few times people would tell me that they were worried about Jim and my relationship being able to get through what we were going through with Amber. The stress that it can out on a relationship and so many end in divorce because the stress is so high and you need someone to take it out on. Trust me there were days that we were at our witts end but Amber always sensed those times and was there mending the fences you could say. She would talk to us and she was always right... fighting just didn't make sense. looking back I wonder if we were raising her or was she just really raising us. Jim and I have always been close but we talked today and agreed that we have never felt closer to each other than now. I couldn't even imagine fighting with Jim because I know it would hurt Amber to see and there was never anything big enough to be worth fighting over. Amber truly taught me so much. I know she is right behind me pushing me to do what I need. To make the most out of each day. Try to find something or someone and make their day better. Today for example....... we received so many flowers at the funeral home that we didn't want them to just sit around the house and die so we found a retirement home and dropped them off. They were so happy to have them. They couldn't believe how many there were. So for all of you that sent flowers know that they served many purposes. Amber would have wanted that. Some of the potted plants/flowers we will plant in her garden and she will be able to still enjoy them. Finally something I decided to share and you can take it for whatever you want. You can even say I am crazy because none of that matters for the gift I received today. I had only told Jim and Brittany today but something is pushing me to type it in here. I saw Amber today. See before Amber passed she kept pushing me to read that story that I shared with you about the little boy and the note he left his mom. I am glad I did. She came to me today very quickly in a thought not a dream. I was thinking of some times with her and I wish I could explain this to you better but she physically came through that vision of a thought and I grabbed her arms and knew instantly what was happening and I told her Amber it is really you... you did it. She said as she struggled to gain control "Yes.... because..." and that was it. She was gone again. My body was flooded with this warm peaceful feeling that I have never felt before. Plus I was in the basement and it had been freezing down there and the warmth flowed so quickly through me. I tried to make myself rethink the thought I had but nothing. I made myself fall asleep thinking that she could come to me in a dream but nothing. However, in just those 2 words she gave me so much. I know she is OK and finding her way and going to be with us always. I will never forget her and will always love her with all my heart..... I love you Amber! melissa

Posted by Cassie at 8:09 AM | Permalink | Comments

The past couple of days have been some of the saddest I have ever experienced in my entire life.
I am grieving for the loss of a young woman who's 14 years on this planet greatly overshadow my existence. Amber, you are inspiring. You are an inspiration to me every single day. For knowing you, I want to be better.
I am not an emotional basket case(the way I think about one)...I am answering the phone (almost) every time it rings. I have answered because I know you care about me, and your phone calls have meant the world. Listening to me LOOSE it and sob and scream to you has helped me face my friends with a bit more dignity.
Thank you for COMPLETELY rearranging your days. Finding babysitters for your children. Thank you for taking time out of your EXTREMELY busy schedules to hold my hand and to hug me. Thank you for taking days off work to be with Amber's Family and to cry with me.. with us. I could have NEVER done this alone.
I am amazed at your strength. I am overwhelmed by your love. I truly do not feel I deserve you. There are no words. So I will say,
Thank You. I love you.
PS: Tomorrow I may not answer my phone. I am spending the day holding my kids. Appreciating each and every second the day allows.
But I promise if you need me, I will be here!

Posted by Cassie at 9:16 PM | Permalink | Comments